No Little Girl and Other Lies

No Little Girl and other lies.

Not so long ago I wrote an article for the Eros Journal about the # PornHarmKids campaign that was centred around the idea that porn is dangerous for children and therefore should be banned. (You can find a copy of the magazine here: http://eros.org.au/NEJ/issue5/mobile/index.html

Look for issue no. 5 and flick to page 16)

On the surface this movement seemed fairly logical (of course no-one wants their kids accidentally stumbling across, or even deliberately seeking out, hardcore pornography) but when looked at a little deeper it was evident that it had far less to do with protecting children, and far more to do with sexual negativity, stopping conversations and sex education, as well as silencing performers and producers and those invested in the adult industry. To the sex-negative radical feminists that lead these movements anyone involved in the sex industry is either a rapist or a victim and anyone who deems to speak out positively about it is a brainwashed idiot who doesn’t care about women or children.

It’s definitely a clever tactic. I mean, there are few things that tug the heart-strings and create emotive responses more than the idea of children being hurt. In the plight to stop world hunger or extreme poverty the images we see on our TVs are of starved, dying children. When we talk car safety, germ cleaning, internet danger, food health, anything really we know that using children, or the phrase “As a mother...” is a clear and effective way to get people thinking with their emotions and are therefore far easier to sway to their way of thinking.

What’s wrong with that? I hear you ask… Of COURSE we don’t want children dying or hurt or damaged. Why is it so bad to protect the most vulnerable among us? We’re adults, that’s our job!

Well yes, of course, you’re right in many ways… But unfortunately for every good thing that comes from the idea of “protecting children” come those who would use our emotions against us, to spread misinformation and downright lies, all in the name of “Saving The Children”.

This is evident when it comes to groups like anti-vaxxers or pro-lifers. They also use photographs of distressed children to get their messages across. They use highly emotive language as well as clever tricks with language to “prove” their sides and dismiss anything spoken against it as conspiracy or “paid shills”, and are quick to delete, block or, in some extreme cases, antagonise and rally against people in the most horrid of ways (look at the anti Light for Riley people or Sandyhook “truthers” if you need evidence of this).

So yes. It’s clever. Really clever. We, as society as a whole, protect our young. We don’t want to see them hurt or upset, and so using them to highlight an issue or danger gives us that instinctual protector vibe and we feel obligated to help.

Probably one of the most distressing things we can think of when it comes to bad things that can happen to our kids is sexual abuse. The idea of their innocence being ripped away, their futures shattered. It’s horrible to think about and even more horrible to know it actually happens. A lot. To children all over the world from the richest suburbs to the most poverty stricken slums. No-one wants to think that this sort of thing might happen to their kids and so campaigns like #PornHarmsKids effectively draws on that as well as the age-old idea that sex itself - not rape or molestation, just sex- is bad and wrong and dirty for women to do unless, of course, they are married, and therefore any woman involved in anything to do with the sex industry must have been forced and is in need of rescue.

It is with these dirty tactics and sex-negative attitudes that the latest hashtag has spawned: #NoLittleGirl.

In the wake of the FOSTA/SESTA debacle (An American bill that claims to fight sex trafficking but that actually just puts sex workers in a lot of danger. For more info, and I absolutely encourage everyone to look into this and why it’s so dangerous, please read here: https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/4/13/17172762/fosta-sesta-backpage-230-internet-freedom ) radical feminists are using the sudden focus on sex trafficking versus sex work (newsflash, there is NO connection between the two) to once again demonise sex work and sex workers by stating that because no little girl would ever possibly dream of growing up to be a sex worker it is somehow proof that the sex industry is gross and dangerous and should be shut down.

Now, by using this logic can we also assume no little girl ever dreamed of cleaning up vomit and shit so therefore we should ban nursing or cleaning? Also I don’t know how many little girls grew up dreaming of working 40 hours a week behind a checkout, so sorry retail industry, you’ve got to go. In fact I could name a hundred jobs that no-one, girl or boy, would ever dream of doing when they grow up because they’re either gross or hard or boring or just terrible. I mean, when you think about it, that’s practically every job! The only difference being that sex work contains sex and sex is icky and bad.

But, regardless of that, the claim that No Little Girl ever dreams of growing up to be a sex worker is in itself false.

How do I know this? Because I was one of them. From the earliest age I can remember, before I knew what sex was, what orgasms were, what lust or love or desire was… Before any of that I knew I liked it. I knew about the sensations and the way it made me feel. I knew I wanted to explore it. As I grew up and learnt words to put to those feelings I got even more curious, and at whatever age it was that I finally found out some people have sex as a job it was something I wanted to do. I have since met hundreds of women who have said the same, and even more who have said they were fascinated by sex and sexual feelings as a kid even if they didn’t necessarily want to do it for work, hell even Dolly Parton claims she looks the way she looks because she modelled herself on the town hooker she once spotted as a child and was fascinated by.

It’s also important to note, because you will NEVER see anti sex work protestors speak of it as it ruins their narrative, that not all sex workers are women, and not all sex work clients are men. This is actually one of the most important omissions in their arguments because it shows the truth. That women using sex as work makes them uncomfortable because sex itself makes them uncomfortable. It’s got NOTHING to do with “protecting’ women and everything to do with “controlling” women’s sexuality and sexual independence, ironically just like what they say they are trying to fight. It’s a bizarre and twisted point of view that has stemmed from the backwards and dangerous way we speak and learn and teach about sex.

We drill sex negativity into children in so many ways, whether it’s referring to certain parts of their body as “rude” or punishing them for exploring themselves “Don’t touch there it’s dirty!” or expecting girls to be “pure” and policing the length of their skirts or bare shoulders. It’s not only ridiculous (there is nothing wrong with bodies) it’s also incredibly dangerous to their growth and development into a healthy adult. The thing is children DO think about sex or the good-feeling sensations they get in their tummies and, while sex itself is certainly not an act for children, the education around it must be positive and void of shame so that they can feel free and safe to explore and learn and have a solid base of facts and family and love to fall back on when things get tricky or confusing. And you know what? If any of those children do decide when they’re older that they want to work in the sex industry, it is up to us as the generation before to provide safe and healthy environments for them to do so. Pushing for a ban on the industry in the name of stopping trafficking is as useless as shutting down the local pharmacy because someone has a meth lab on the street. 

Sex work IS work. It is a valid and necessary job that provides comfort and intimacy and fun as well as financial security and independence for the people who do it. Regardless of if the provider is working from the penthouse suite of a fancy hotel or on the street, each of them, and every level in between, deserves respect and security and protection and the only way that this can be done is with decriminalisation. It doesn’t actually matter if YOU personally would never do that job or find it distasteful, it’s not about you. It’s about the fact that sex work is not ever going to go away and it shouldn’t have to. That sex trafficking is NOT the same and there are already laws and legislations in place for combatting it. And that as humans living on the same planet we have an obligation to make sure everyone doing a job is kept safe and has the same rights and protections as anyone else doing a job.

If you need any more proof that I am not alone and that sex workers and women around the world actually DID think about sex and pleasure when they were kids, go and search out the hashtag. In true internet activist style it has been taken over by sex positivity and stories from all over the world and all over the gender spectrum showing how false this claim really is and what a ridiculous logic leap they’ve taken.

In my activism and my feminism I truly believe that the only thing little girls should ever grow up not wanting to do is silence other women and stifle their choices (some of whom are the most vulnerable and marginalised in the world) and put them in unsafe and dangerous positions just because what they’ve chosen to do makes her feel icky. Listen to sex workers, provide them with rights not rescue, and join the fight for decriminalisation… And please, stop using children to clutch at your pearls. Their hands are only small and they’d rather be playing with Lego.

Review: G-Vibe 2 A Toy for Women, Men and Couples

If you read a lot of my reviews you'll already know that I am an aesthetic kinda chick when it comes to sex toys. Shape, colours and packaging are really quite important to me, as well as (of course) the functionality of the toy itself. I mean, you can have a fabulous looking toy made out of the softest, silkiest silicone resting in the most luxurious looking box, but if it fails to hit the spot, then none of that outside stuff matters. Similarly I have come across toys that are ugly and weird-looking with packaging that looks like it was dug up from some time-warped 1970s porno but, when put to the test, have rocked my socks. I just don't particularly like looking at them when they're down there doing their thing, and they certainly aren't the sort of toy I'd bring out in company.

But chuck all of that pretty, buzzy goodness into one toy, and you have yourself a complete fan.

Enter the G-Vibe 2.

This is a toy I have been wanting to try since I saw the first version a couple of years ago. It's unique shape was the first thing to catch my eye and then, after I had a small hand play with it to test the feel of the material and go through all of the functions, I was determined to get one and see if it was all it seemed to be when resting in my hands.

Let me say, it pretty much is. There are a few little things I found didn't quite hit the mark, but really, almost all those things probably come down to my body and my needs and, because everyone is different, they might not be the same for you.

Probably one of the best, and most unique aspects of this toy is it can be used as a solo toy for both women or men and can also be incorporated into couples play too! It's pretty damn versatile really. It absolutely impressed me.

Let's start with the specs.

Made of medical grade, silky smooth silicone, it really does feel beautiful in your hands and against your skin. It is 100% waterproof and is rechargeable so you don't need to worry about batteries. The charger is magnetic and can be a bit temperamental, so just make sure it's in a place it won't accidentally get moved or something.
It takes about an hour or two to fully charge up and then lasts for around four hours of continual play.

It has three powerful but quiet motors, one in each arm near the tips and one in the main shaft, and has six different vibration pulses as well as eight (yes eight!) different speeds.

The two “V”shaped ends are flexible and can be pushed together or spread out, although you do need to hold them in position or they return to their original shape.

It comes nestled in a pretty box and has a silky bag to store it in if you don't want to keep it in the box.

The handle is easy to hold and the buttons are simple to work out (one goes up in speed, one goes down and the other changes the pulse settings) and they're super easy to press.

One of the cool things that comes in the box is a set of illustrations showing you all the different ways you can use the toy and, for the most part, they are pretty good. Although there are a couple that are a bit silly and make no sense or really don't do what they claim.

Like a Rabbit

Using both arms to stimulate both the inside of your vagina and the clitoris and vulva you can simulate the sensations you get from a rabbit vibe. Because the arms are quite flexible you can push them against you to a few different angles to get the best feelings. Several of the vibration settings alternate several buzzes and pulses at the same time and also swap them between arms creating interesting, almost unpredictable sensations. You can use it to stimulate both vaginally and anally at the same time and, because the arms stretch out if you push down, you can get it to reach both the clitoris and anus at the same time too.

That Full-Up Feeling

Something I hear from a lot of women is that, although they often enjoy the feeling of being full, the pressure and strain that a thick vibrator can put on the opening and the walls of their vagina can be uncomfortable or even sometimes painful. The great thing about the G-Vibe 2 is that you can have your full-up cake and eat it too without the fear of that pressure. Squeezing the two arms together you insert the toy and, as it enters it begins to fall open to its natural state, the arms push gently against the walls without putting any undue pressure on you.

For Him

It's very rare for a toy to be so versatile it can be used in a variety of ways for both sexes. Sure with other toys you can improvise with buzzes on bits and that's awesome, but the G-Vibe 2 has some great features that make it really awesome and easy for men to use.

Sliding the cock between the two “Vs” gives a great tingling all-over buzz to the penis and you can hold it there for all sorts of couples activities too (see below).

Pushing the “V”open and resting them between the balls and the perineum also feels (according to the husbandman) “really fucking cool.” and, if he is so inclined, you can use it anally to stimulate his G-spot.

Couples Play

Using toys together as a couple is a great way to enhance your sex life. Having that extra stimulation and the means to play and experiment with sensation is a really awesome way to open up and explore your and your partner's sexuality and sexual needs. With the G-Vibe 2 you can incorporate the toy into oral sex, Spanish style (that's tit-fucking in non-crass speak), even intercourse to really jazz up the moment.

I will say, the picture of the oral sex and resting the toy on your chin is a little bit weird and I'm not too much into my whole jaw tingling like that. It made my ears tickle and I felt like I needed to sneeze... But if you slide the penis into the “V” and hold it there instead it stops your face from jiggling and still creates the awesome sensations for him.

It Just Doesn't... Work that way

As well as the resting the toy on your jaw pic, there are a couple of others that just don't seem to work for me... Or really for anyone. The most obvious of these is the nipple one. I'm sorry, but I've been selling this toy in retail shops for a couple of years now (the first version and this one) and I have never ever EVER come across someone who has boobs that close together. The scale of the toy they've used in this pic is way off and even when I squeeze my boobs together as close as they can get, yeah I can sort of get them both... But holy crap it's not comfortable nor sexy. I'm really not sure why they've kept that illustration in. In every other review I have read on both versions 1 and 2, the verdict on this particular position has been one of “that just doesn't work!”

Considering the number of ways you can use this toy, it seems weird they've left instructions in for one that really, really doesn't.

Overall, apart from the boob pic and the jaw tickling, this is one amazing toy with some of the most versatile features I've ever come across. I would definitely recommend this to people who are nervous about introducing toys into their bedroom because of the fact it has great uses for both male and female users and also as a couples toy so it could potentially break down those barriers of “vibrators are just for girls”and the common worry men can have of “if she's got a vibrator does that mean I'm not doing it for her” and similar concerns like that.

For those reasons, and all the other awesome ones I've described up there, I give this toy an 8.5 out of ten.

Happy Buzzing, My Friends

Review: Permission 4 Pleasure Box Set.

DISCLAIMER:

Morgana Muses; the owner, producer, writer and star of Permission 4 Pleasure films is my friend. In fact, she is one of the very best friends I have ever had. We met just as her journey was starting to blossom and I have watched her grow into the amazing, award-winning, much sought after feminist pornographer you see today. Her most recent award being the winner of Heartthrob of the Year at the 2015 Feminist Porn Awards.

I must also mention that I was involved with one of the films I am reviewing here, as a script consultant, and have spent many nights gas-bagging on the phone about scenes and upcoming ideas and projects, and always screeching with laughter, because we are so very funny together. Seriously. We should have our own show.

All that being said, I will be as objective and as neutral in this review as I can possibly be. Enjoy, and never forget to give yourself permission for pleasure. You're worth it.

Permission 4 Pleasure Box Set - A Review

Morgana Muses is an incredible woman who, in her late 40s, decided that being an unhappy wife and the mother of two gorgeous girls was not enough to keep her fulfilled. Her children were grown and almost ready to begin their lives away from the nest, her marriage was one of constant second guessing and depression and she wondered to herself “is this it?”

Taking an almighty plunge, Morgana left her life as “suburban housewife” and stepped into a world of erotic storytelling, freedom of expression and pornography... And she hasn't looked back. Her films follow this journey of awakening telling everyone, women, men, young and old, allow yourself to enjoy, express and indulge yourself. Give yourself Permission for Pleasure.

Winning numerous awards, including at the Good For Her Feminist Porn Awards, the CineKink film festival and being featured in international film festivals in Berlin, Paris and New York, Morgana is the new kid on the block making waves with her fantastic message.

Duty Bound

Winner Petra Joy Award 2012. Selected for Cinekink NYC 2014. Nominated Feminist Porn Award 2014

This is Morgana's first film. It is only a very short vignette (four minutes) but it encompasses a lifetime of emotion. An erotic tale of desire and the search for self, an awakening of passion and the epitome of what Permission 4 Pleasure is all about, all set to a gorgeous erotic film of mostly black and white.

I love this film. I love it for its message, for it's beauty. It's not a horny film. It's not porn in the sense most people think about, but that's the point. Everything we are taught by mainstream media about sex, pleasure and sensuality all fits into a neat little box. But desire is not something only one box can hold and it's time to speak to the many who prefer life outside that box.
Morgana Muses is that storyteller. And boy does she do it well.

New Tricks

This film is probably my least favourite of the lot. It has some amazing potential and would be really interesting to see her maybe re-do it now that her experience has grown.

The theme of this stays true to the running theme of P4P and is based on those ridiculous “How to Be a Proper Wife” handbooks from the 1950s.

You know the ones. Full of rules about ladies being seen and not heard and living life to fulfil the whims of their husbands.

Taking the rule book and twisting it to an erotic theme is not only clever, it's a great reflection on the life Morgana left and the one she has subsequently created.
My issue with the film is that I found the scenes (especially the first one) to be far too long and rather stagnant. There's not a lot of camera changes and I found the couple performing in the first scene to be as stagnant as the shots. Some more noise, some movement and some close up action would have jazzed it up a bit. It kind of looked and felt like they were mostly going through the motions rather than absolutely enjoying each other, which I reckon would have really improved it.

The second scene, the four girl orgy, was definitely better. These girls are very obviously enjoying themselves and each other. There's some of the most natural and body-shaking orgasms I've seen in recent years and you truly get a sense of connection, friendship and lust with these women. There's laughter and conversation and a real bond you can feel through the screen.

Again it probably could have been shorter, but it was definitely enjoyable to watch.

Music Box

Honourable Best Mention Cinekink 2014. Nominated for Feminist Porn Awards 2014. Selected Berlin Porn Festival 2014.

Starring internationally acclaimed, award winning feminist porn star Zahra Stardust this is another great film in which Morgana uses her real life experience to translate into art.

It's the story of a woman packing her bags as she reflects on who, what and where she is in life.
The discovery of an old music box sets her imagination and passion flaring and we see a glimpse into the mind of a woman desperate to break free of the bonds of normality and to be swept up into a dance of erotic freedom and self expression.

Showcasing her magnificent pole dancing skills as well as her very erotic and sexy self-pleasuring techniques, Zahra shows us what real sexual freedom can feel like.

I think the only think I don't like about this film is the fact that Zahra wears a full face mask throughout a lot of it and I personally do not like them. I understand the concept and why they chose to use the mask, we all wear masks, we are all Morgana inside at one stage or another in our lives, but for me personally I find them a bit weird. It's a mark of how good the film is that, even faced with something I usually find quite confronting and scary, I was still turned on and enjoyed watching.

A Call For Help

Selected Berlin Porn Film Festival 2014. Selected Cinekink 2015.

This is my favourite out of the whole box set. It could be because this is the film I helped work on, but I really do think it's more than that.

This film was definitely a step outside the box. This film is basically a comedy. Yes, you heard right, comedy porn.

And it works! It's funny! It's erotic. It tells a story. It's definitely something I am very proud to have worked on but I am even more proud of Morgana for creating this idea and concept and then being able to pull it off successfully.

This film tells the story of Rebecca who is trying very very hard to masturbate herself to climax.

We've all been there. Whatever you try, whatever you use, you just can't reach that peak. Frustrating!! So Bec decides to put a call out to her friends to help.

The film then follows her friends, via three short vignettes, who are all in their own erotic entanglements and unable to really help... Or are they?

Of the three middle stories, two of them have been recently selected to be played in international festivals.

Picnic Outside

Probably the weakest of all the vignettes, this one is a sensual scene of outdoor loving. There isn't a lot of comedy nor explicit sex in this scene, which is one of the reasons why I think it's the weakest, but the photobombing cat walking through centre screen at one stage certainly lightened it up.

As I mentioned this one is far less explicit than any of the others, but there are a couple of moments of erotic connection between the couple and that is quite lovely.

Happy Birthday Mistress - Selected for Nachtschatten BDSM/Fetisch Film Festival, Germany

Professional Dominatrix, Domina Vex, shows us how a Mistress expects to be treated on her birthday. With spanking and flogging and wrapping and even balloon popping, this small scene is abundant with fetishes without being overwhelming. The pure enjoyment on her face as she plays with her slave and celebrates her birthday is one of the reasons I love this scene. It is a joy to be allowed a glimpse into her dungeon and an honour to share her birthday treat.

The Mechanic - Nominated for Feminist Porn Award 2015

I love this scene. It's funny, it's sexy, it's erotic and it definitely shows us why Morgana is getting a reputation as having one of the “prettiest gineys in porn”.

When she takes her car to the mechanic he definitely gets to have a thorough look under the hood and gives a whole new meaning to the words “Drive Shaft”.

There is so much raw energy and erotic passion in this scene that you feel like you need to wind the windows down a little bit to reduce some of the steam.

The film wraps up like it begins, with colour, humour and a sense of real enjoyment by all who were involved. And that's the sense I get from almost all of her films. A real connection between the actors and the screen. A feeling of pleasure and friendship and of the bonds we create when we open ourselves up to erotic experience.

This box set is the start of what I know is going to be a long and successful journey for my wonderful friend. The accolades she is receiving from industry professionals around the globe are those often saved for veterans of the field. That these praises are coming so soon and in such volume for a relative new beginner is a testament to her vision, her hard work and her passion to make wonderful films and educate the world on living their own erotic truths.

She is an inspiration to so many and someone I am proud to know both personally and professionally.

The box set is available to buy from here and from there you can follow and stay informed about all the new adventures she is taking this year.

Review: G-Ki by Je Joue

Something I'm really loving about all the new top-of-the-line sex toys these days is the packaging. I know that probably sounds a bit silly, but it's true. They say first impressions last, and I believe this has as much to do about products you buy as well as people you meet and the Je Joue G-Ki is no exception.

From the minute it arrived I was impressed. The box is solid and elegant looking, with the simple logo spelled out in silver against the black and tied up with a silky ribbon. It really did have a touch of sophistication about it. It's kind of like unwrapping a Tiffany's box, you know something fantastic is going to be inside.

The G-Ki itself mirrors the tastefulness of the packaging. It is made of smooth, high grade silicone (available in black, midnight purple, fuchsia and pink) and has a sleek shape that is completely adjustable to fit you and your needs perfectly.

Completely adjustable, you ask? What does that mean? Well it means that the Je Joue G-Ki is pretty unique in what it can do. On the side of the toy are two raised buttons which, when pressed (you must push both at the same time), allows you to bend and lock the toy from the slight curved shape it come in the box with to a sort of “J” shaped position, and any angle in between the two which makes it absolutely perfect for G-spot stimulation. I've come across quite a few toys that will bend and flex, but I don't know if I've ever come across one that locks itself into place so you don't have to think about it once it's in the right position.
Just as women come in all shapes and sizes, so do vaginas and G-spot locations (some are higher, some are lower, some need more stimulation, others need less) and so to be able to custom design the curve to suit you is a fantastic feature.
It can take a little bit of pushing etc to get it in the right spot but when you find it, you'll know. In fact the very first time I used it I was able to achieve a very rare (for me) clitoris-free orgasm and, for a girl who likes her clitoris orgasms and who, before this toy, rarely had sole G-spot ones, that's saying a lot.

Another thing that impressed me was the fact that this toy is completely battery free and comes with a magnetic charger that attaches itself to the on/off buttons.

It doesn't take too long to charge either (a couple of hours should do it), and a little light will stop flashing when it's fully charged to let you know it's ready to use. The other benefit of this sort of charger means that, as well as being slightly more environmentally friendly, it also makes the toy completely waterproof. Bath anyone?

Speaking of things I really love about this toy, it is equipped with an awesome range of vibrations. All up there are ten settings (yes, ten!). The first five are different strengths of continuous buzz and the rest are sequenced buzzes and pulses that range in speed and intensity and, I have to say, they're all pretty damn good. And quiet. Really, really quiet!

The buttons you push to change through the settings are simple and easy to use. Hold the plus sign button for about 2 seconds to turn it on and then push through the same button to find the buzz you like the best. The minus sign will backtrack through the settings or, if held down for 2 seconds, will turn it off. Easy. It doesn't “remember” your setting though so if you accidentally turn it off you have to go back through the sequence to find it.

Because it is made of silicone you need to use a water-based lube with it rather than a silicone-based one which will react with the toy and damage it. It's super easy to clean with an antibacterial toy cleaner, and it fits snugly back in its box when you've finished.

If you can't tell, I really, really like this toy. A lot. It has changed the way I orgasm and has made my G-spot my new, easy-to-find best friend, well in equal place with my clitoris anyway. Because of that I have no hesitation to give this toy a 9/10, and the only reason I haven't given it full marks is because I don't think anything is ever as good as the real thing, with a real person, but this one definitely comes close.

Review: We-Vibe 4 Plus

If you haven't already figured it out, I love We-Vibes. Seriously. Every single We-Vibe product I have ever tried has, at one time or another, found pride of place in my top bedroom drawer. There was the We-Vibe 2 and then the We-Vibe 3 . I also had the pleasure of trialling their first solo play toy, the We-Vibe Thrill and, most recently, the We-Vibe 4. I also have in the wings (coming very soon) reviews of the We-Vibe Salsa, Tango and Touch which, like the Thrill, are solo toys... But the best, and probably the most exciting new version of the world's most favourite couple's toy is the We-Vibe 4+, which the awesome folk over at Sex Toys 24/7 gave me to try out.

To look at it it really isn't all that different to the We-Vibe 4. Same great, compact “c” shape, same matte silicone finish, same wireless charging capabilities, and the two motors on either end have the same awesome vibration and pulse settings (there are three speeds and five different rhythms programmed in, but keep reading to see what else it does). It's fully waterproof (although the remote is not), super easy to clean with a good toy cleaner and so quiet you wouldn't even know it was on if it's not touching you.

So, what's actually different about this toy that has the world (and me) in a bit of a spin?

Firstly, and this is completely aesthetic but cool to me, is that as well as the pink and purple colours of the We-Vibe 4, the Plus also comes in a cool gun-metal grey/black/blue (it's sort of a combination of all three) colour. 

And secondly, and most importantly, this toy comes with an app for your smart phone (bluetooth must be enabled to synch it)

“An app?” I hear you say. “What possible reason would a wireless, remote control toy need an app?”

Well, let me tell you.

The app (available for free from The Apple Store or Google Play) allows you to access five bonus pulse/buzz settings and has a sixth setting that allows you to program in your own settings. Yep. You heard me right. You can customise this toy to buzz and pulse in any combination/sequence you desire. You can change the speed of each motor independently (although I haven't figured out how to create two separate rhythm settings in each arm, so I'm not sure if you can or not) You can also use the app to search for tips and hints and suggestions on all the different ways you can use it, including anally, orally and as a penis stimulator. You can also set it to a timer! But probably the best and most awesome feature of this app is that you (or your partner) can access and control it from anywhere in the world!! Anywhere!! All you need is your toy's unique code which you can then send via text or email to anyone who has the app and give them control over the controls.

You could be in Sydney, and your partner could be in China and, with the use of modern technology, you can still play together! Seriously cool! It's particularly awesome for couples in long distance relationships or where one partner travels a lot. Seriously gives a whole new spin on the term phone sex! It's truly amazing!

The app will also tell you how much battery life you have left on the toy which is really handy - a few hours of charge should give you about three hours of continual play!

I know it might sound a bit fiddly and complicated, but it's actually not. This app is really user-friendly and simple to understand.

A few little glitches that I've found in my experiments with this toy are that you really need a good internet/wi-fi connection because every now and then the wireless connectivity can cut out and, every so often I found using the remote as well as the app seemed to cut the app off. Also it cannot be accessed by your partner without you giving “permission” via the invite app (which, once invited, gives you roughly 30 minutes to access it before the app connectivity shuts down) so it's not like you can wear it all day and they can randomly turn it on from their phone without you knowing. But these are really minor things considering the awesomeness of what this toy does and can do for couples living apart.

Seriously, gang. This is one toy every couple needs in their toybox! I give it a 9/10 because really the only thing it can't do is give you a hug, bring you a cup of coffee and tell you it loves you.

I seriously cannot WAIT to see what We-Vibe come up with next! Who knows. Maybe it will link to your coffee machine and develop a hug-and-love-you feature. (kidding. Mostly)
Until next time,

Happy buzzing, my friends... Wherever in the world you may be!

Review: Fun Factory Stronic Eins

I've been testing and reviewing toys for years now and over that time I've enjoyed watching the industry grow and change. I've seen improved, softer, smoother materials. New shapes to replace the typical lady finger style, bright colours that have moved away from flesh coloured penises, and fresh attitudes towards them creating more acceptance for women to buy and use them. It's been liberating and exciting to be part of, but, in saying all that, it's actually really rare that something new catches my attention as something "different".

I mean essentially vibrators and dildos, as much as they've changed, are still basically the same. Regardless of whether they use batteries, or have a rechargeable power source, or even plug into mains power, at the end of the day they buzz, they tickle, they go in and around your bits and help make your sex life more exciting and stimulating.

There have only been a few toys in the past ten or so years that have wowed me to the point of "oh my god this is so brilliant and so innovative why didn't I think of this!"

The two that come instantly to mind for me are the We-Vibe range and the Jimmy Jane Form Two, and now I am pleased and a little excited to add another genuinely different type of toy to this exclusive list.
The Stronic range from Fun Factory.

The first time I saw one I thought "Oh yeah, just another rechargeable straight vibe with bright colours". Nice and smooth, cool colours and magnetically chargeable, but not "different" . And then I turned it on.

From the instant I felt it move in my hands I wanted to try one and, luckily for me and the work that I do, it wasn't long before an awesome company (the good folk over at Sex Toys 24/7) offered me one, the Stronic Eins, to try.

So what is it about this toy that makes it so different? Unlike almost every vibrator out there, regardless of shape or style, this toy does not simply vibrate - although there are some settings that have vibration included.

No. This toy is different. This toy thrusts. Like actually thrusts in and out. This is due to two large ball bearings that move up and down the shaft and push it back and forth. Seriously strong movements, I reckon this thing would kick arse in a vibrator race.

It's made of phthalate free silicone and has a thick, solid feel about it. It has three really simple to use buttons. One to turn it on and off and two (a + and a -) that change the speed, rhythm and intensity of the thrusts. All up it has ten different settings from slow pulses to fast thumping, vibrating awesomeness and blended mixtures of them all.

Because of the thick, matte silicone you need quite a lot of lube to make sure it's properly slippery (I'd recommend something water-based and thick like Wicked's Toy Love lube) and, although I've read several releases from the company that claim it can be used hands-free, this requires great concentration and mega strong kegels which not everyone has so you may need to hold it in place a bit to make sure it doesn't fall out, but once it's turned on the sensations it gives are not like anything I've ever felt before from a sex toy.

It sort of thumps and pushes and pulsates inside you. Awesome for internal and g-spot stimulation.
I can honestly say it felt pretty damn good. If you're like me however, and rarely, if ever, orgasm from penetration alone (and according to research around 80% of women can't), you'll probably need a little extra help "getting over the orgasm hill". All good, folks. One of my trusty, buzzy bullet-style vibes did the trick and all I can say is WOW! The buzz, matched with the thumping, pulsing, thrusting movements from the Eins, kept my orgasm going for longer and stronger than when I just use a vibrator. It was an all over orgasm. Clitoral, vaginal and mental. It was, in the simplest of terms, fucking sensational.

If you don't like the idea of having to use two hands to hold both the Eins and a bullet you could always slip a vibrating cockring over the shaft to add to the clitoral stimulation and I reckon that'd work just as well.

As I mentioned earlier about kegels, this thing will definitely help with the training and strengthening of them because your vagina squeezes and holds on to it and it's also really fun to have someone else using it on you and keeping it in place.

It charges magnetically and, although I've used it quite a few times since its initial charge, it's still going strong.

It's 100% waterproof so you can submerge it in the bath and also comes with a two year manufacturers warranty.

I really rate this toy. For innovation, uniqueness, sensation and performance. If you're looking for something new and different to add to your toy box they don't come much better than this.

There are three Stronics in the range so far, the Eins the Zwei and Drei (one two three), and each one has the same amazing thrust technology but are slightly different in texture and shape. 

To check them out go HERE and do yourself and your orgasms a favour.

Until next time, 
Happy buzzing (or thrusting), my friends!

Review: Jimmy Jane Form 2

This is an older review, however, revisiting the toy recently has confirmed everything I originally thought and wrote about it....

Enjoy! I certainly have been!

As a sex toy reviewer it is very rare that I see something new and exciting. Yes toys are improving day by day with new materials, better buzz settings and charging options etc, but, when it comes to design, mostly it's a bit same old same old when going through the range. This is why, when I first saw the Jimmy Jane Form 2 on a website, I knew it was one I had to try one to see if what I was seeing was actually as good as it looked.

Let me first say yes. It absolutely was. Now, let me explain:

One of the most popular selling sex toys ever is The Rabbit. Almost every toy company has one in their range and, as much as I always enjoyed the rabbit part of them, I never really used the main part. This then became an issue of having a bulky phallic toy attached to the buzzy clitoral stimulation of the rabbit ears (or penguin beak or dolphin nose or whatever cutesy critter was amimal-of-the-month on these types of toys) and just seemed like a waste. I've found a few little “just rabbit” toys around the place but mostly they were flimsy and lacked any kind of power and were a bit of a let down. Since then, however, the designers of Jimmy Jane Form 2 seem to have read my thoughts and have created a toy that is essentially just the rabbit but with the feel and power of a proper clitoral vibrator.

The shape is a bit like a fat tuning fork with a small palm-sized body and two prongs and is made of silky phthalate-free silicone (with a stainless steel base where it's charged).

It has four different vibration settings, five levels of power and two (one in each prong) motors which, for such a small toy, gives it a real advantage in power. The pulses and vibrations are all pretty good; waves, beats, shakes and buzzes, and work together inside the prongs to give maximum sensation to your bits. Some of the pulses are in stereo (meaning each ear vibrates at the same speed and time) and in other settings they vary a bit, allowing a multitude of sensations to flutter and buzz against you.

Another interesting and unique thing about this toy is that while yes, you can hold it so that one of the prongs is directly on your clitoris, that's not the primary way this toy is supposed to be used. You see, what a lot of people don't know is that the nerves of the clitoris fan out from their central point and the unique design of the ears allows this toy to use those outer nerve endings to stimulate orgasm. In my opinion this doesn't minimise sensation (although it is a bit different), but it can be great for girls who find right-on-the-clit buzzes to be a bit too much. It can also be used in a similar way around the nipple and areola.

It is completely waterproof, so you can use it in the shower or bath and is also fully rechargeable with a little dock/stand to sit it in which is a bit like a iPod. The setting on the charge stand is quite sensitive, so if you accidentally knock it or don't place it properly on the dock it stops charging. It only takes about two hours to fully charge and then lasts around seven hours before you need to re-dock it. Simple warm water or a toy cleaner will get it ready for your next use and it also comes with a three year limited warranty.

This really is a great new and unique toy that makes me happy and satisfied and full of hope that the toy industry is not going stale and that there are always new idea to find.

Until next time, 

Happy buzzing, my friends!

Review: Nu Sensuelle Point

 Okay, girls. Are you looking for a small, clitoral vibe that has power and functions beyond your wildest imagination?

Do you want it sleek and smooth? Whisper quiet? Super easy to clean and store? Rechargeable and with a super long life? Want warranties and assurances? And all for under $100.00?

Of course you do! So, let me introduce you to one of the best and most powerful toys I have ever come across which has all these features and more and, considering how many toys I get to test and play with every month, that's a pretty big call.

The Nu Sensuelle Point (by S.Wet) is this toy; Small and compact enough to carry around in your handbag, powerful enough to elicit the most intense orgasms and sensations and so quiet sometimes the only way you know it's on is cos there's a little light on the bottom and, when you turn it on in your palm it rolls around like a crazy thing!

I seriously love this toy. Not only does it have three ridiculously strong vibration levels, it also has an extra 17 (yes, you read correctly SEVENTEEN) pulse settings. All up, that makes this a twenty function toy which is just crazy!

It is fully rechargeable and has a cute little stand to sit in while it recharges. The flashing red light will let you know when it's charging and then turns green and solid when it's fully charged. It only takes an hour or so to charge up from being fully dead and then lasts for bloody ages! I have had this toy for a few months now and it gets used fairly regularly and I have only had to charge it a couple of times.

The best toy to compare it to would be (another favourite of mine) the We-Vibe Salsa. It's about the same size and shape but has a more matte finish than a shiny one, and is also about five times more powerful on its highest settings.

Because of its small size it doesn't get in the way of stuff if you want to use it as an accompaniment to sex and, because of its super powerful buzzes, it can also be felt by your partner when you use it while fucking.

The only things I would say could be improved on this toy are that it isn't fully waterproof so you can't take it into the bath with you (although it's water resistant so you can take it into the shower if you're careful), and it doesn't have a “pulse memory” so, if you find a favourite setting, you have to push through them all to get to it every time you turn it on and, if you accidentally skip past it while pushing through, you have to go through the whole lot again.

One more improvement that could possibly be made is that the silicone material it is made out of is pretty hard. These guys also do a twenty function, rechargeable buttplug and I think the softer silicone they use on that one would be a good alternative for people who prefer their toys a little less rigid.

But really, these are minor points compared to the stuff I really love about this toy. It has taken pride of place in my top bedside drawer and just a quick spray and wipe with a good toy cleaner is all you need to do to keep it clean and hygienic.

I have quite a few more of this brand to review so stay tuned! So far I haven't come across a bad one!

I give the Nu Sensuelle Point a 9/10 and highly recommend it to all you clit-buzzing, bullet-loving girls out there!

Until next time,

Happy buzzing, my friends!

Review: Lelo Ida

I have to admit, I have been rather curious about this toy since the first time I saw it, but not in the way I am normally “curious” about new toys. Sometimes I see one in a shop or a picture and think “I have to try this! It looks amazing!” But this time I was more on the side of “How is this possibly going to work? It looks so bulky and awkward! I need to try this and see if it works!” So, when I was asked to review, it I jumped at the chance to see what was what and if my trepidation was legitimate.

I have reviewed other Lelo toys before and I have to say, they are a blend of hit and miss. Most of their solo toys are fun and user friendly, with a few issues here and there, but their couples toys always seem to miss the mark. This one, the Ida, falls into the miss category in quite a few ways and makes some of the problems I've had with their other couples toys seem insignificant.

Like all Lelo toys, it looks rather elegant. The rich magenta colour of the toy, with it's glinting gold base, is luxurious looking as is the simple black box it arrives in. But that's about where the luxury ends. The toy is made of a hard silicone and resembles those hooks you get on the back of doors to hang your bag or towel on. The hook part of the toy is bendy and flexible (Although the actual material isn't) and is inserted into the vagina, and the base rests against the outside and is used as a clitoral stimulator. It comes with Lelo's custom remote control that works with either the pushing of buttons or the sense-motion technology they use which means, depending on which way you hold it in your hand and turn and move it, it changes changes the way the toy moves and vibrates. This has always confused me and other partners, but it can be fun trying to figure it all out.

When it's turned on, the hook/insertable bit buzzes like a normal vibrator but it also moves around, a bit like when you circle your index finger, and is supposed to work as a G-Spot stimulator. The base buzzes too and rests against your clitoris.

The main thought that has gone through my head when looking at pictures and then finally having it in my hand to play with and feel, is that the insertable bit is too big. I say too big because it's a couples toy and you're also supposed to accommodate a penis inside yourself too while this thing spins and buzzes. But again, I decided to wait and try it before drawing any definite conclusions. After all, I am a girl who doesn't mind that “full up” feeling, and the vagina is a remarkably stretchy and flexible part of the body (It can push babies out of it!).

So, onto the testing. During foreplay my partner and I played around with the toy, using the hook end to stimulate the clitoris and also push inside, and I have to say, it was a bit crap. The buzzes weren't all that strong and, when inserted, it was a bit hard to feel the thing actually moving. I was also distracted and put off by the noise. This really is one noisy toy. Other toys I have had that are this loud are at least accompanied by a strong vibration to match the noise levels, but this one was just loud. We decided it was time to try out the main function, which is of course the fact that it's a couples toy, and so, with the toy inserted, my partner went to join it.

To say it was a tight fit is being kind. Yes, my partner is rather well endowed (no bragging, just saying) but even if he wasn't I can imagine it being uncomfortable to fit something else inside when this is there and, even with his penis pushing against it, I still couldn't really feel the rotation function of the toy.

The base part was buzzing okay on my clitoris but I kept having to shift around to get it in the right spot, which actually physically hurt. I put this down to a few of things. One, the material is hard and kind of bashed against me. Two, the insert part is too big. And three, maybe it was just the position we were in. So we changed to see if it felt better from behind.

It didn't. It actually felt worse. I asked my partner how he was feeling and he said it was uncomfortable to the point of being almost painful. He said the hard material against his penis was off-putting and the tightness was not the “good kind of tightness”. He actually said, and I quote, “It's like a horrible hard rod pushing and scraping on my cock.”

The toy comes with a little booklet full of tips and diagrams on how to best use it and we tried pretty much all of the positions. None of them felt any good. They all just felt tight and hard and uncomfortable for both of us and I have to say I was really, really disappointed. Even though I hadn't had high expectations, I hadn't expected the thing to be as painful as it was and it really kind of ruined the experience for both of us.

I honestly think the main problem with this toy is the material it is made from. If it was soft and squishy (with a more powerful motor and less noise) I can actually see it working in the way they are trying, but the way it is, I honestly would not recommend it to anyone. There are far better couples toys out there on the market and, considering how much most of them cost, I personally think this one is a complete rip off.

Sorry, Lelo, this toy gets a 2/10 from me. And that's being generous and mostly because I like the colour and can see potential if certain things are changed.

An Added Edit: I have since talked to many other people who have used this toy and nearly every single one of them has had the same experience as I did. The one exception is a few people who bought it not as a couples toy, but as a solo play anal toy and they found it was really good for that. Because I am not really all that much into anal play at all I haven't used it for that purpose so I can't give any feedback, but maybe that's a better way for this toy to be marketed and advertised.
Until next time,

Happy Buzzing, my friends!

Review: We-Vibe 4

I really like We-Vibes. I have tried, tested and reviewed quite a few of their products (you can read some of them, as well as loads of other sex-based stuff I write, here yes click it it's a link ) and have always enjoyed them, especially their couples toys. I will admit that some of the earlier versions  had some issues with certain usability factors but they were still fun and enjoyable and, as each update came along, those issues were sorted out to make it better and better. And now we have come to the 4.

            The We-Vibe 4 is different to the others in a few ways. The first being the material it is made out of. Gone is the slick, shiny silicone which, especially when all lubed up, had a tendency to move about a bit and lose it's hold. It's been replaced with a more matte silicone that is smooth and velvety to the touch and doesn't get anywhere near as slippery. They have also changed the size and shape a bit. The toy itself is smaller and the insertable end isn't as bulbous as the previous ones, but still manages to hit the spot like the We-Vibe III did.

            The vibrations also seem to have improved with more intensity to the buzzes and, although there are a few differences to the pulse patterns, all six of the settings are good and suitable for everyone's  different preferences of strength and vibration.

            The remote is a bit different too. Where as on the III there was just one button to push through the modes, the We-Vibe 4 has four easy to use buttons that can increase the intensity (up for more, down for less and to turn off) and change back and forth (side to side) through the settings so you don't always have to go right through the whole sequence to get back to the one you like best.

            To use it all you have to do to turn it on is push down the little button on the front end of the toy for about two seconds and then either push through that to get to the sequence and intensity you like, or use the remote. Just hold the remote next to the toy and press the top button down for a few seconds and it syncs up. If you need to, use a bit of lube (always use a water-based lubricant with toys as some silicone ones can damage the material) to insert the smaller end and then the larger end rests nicely against your clitoris. It can be a great toy to use solo, but as a couples toy, it really comes into its own when your partner slides in next to it. The G-Spot is stimulated, the clitoris is stimulated and the penis is as well. My partner really enjoyed it. He said the material felt nice and the inserted part was not distracting or in the way at all and the vibrations were “sensational”. It really is a great toy for everyone!

            The remote control (which comes with a lithium coin cell battery) has a range of around three metres and, because the toy has a really quiet motor, it could be a fun thing to take out on a naughty dinner date or shopping trip. The new, less slippery silicone, means that it won't slide around too much if you're standing or walking and the remote is small and discrete enough for your partner to put in their pocket and push at their discretion.

            It's fully waterproof (not the remote though) and really easy to clean with a good toy cleaner or antibacterial soap, and it comes with a stand to sit in while it charges. It charges via usb, which can be a bit tricky if your computers are in a part of the house that other people use, but a converter plug is cheap and easy and then you can charge it wherever you like.

All in all this new version of the We-Vibe is a real winner and I think the only thing they could maybe do to improve on it (We-Vibe 5 perhaps) would be a feature where you could have the two motors able to be doing different pulses and sequences at the same time, to really maximise enjoyment and buzz-ability.

I give this new version a 9/10 and think it is definitely an upgrade We-Vibe lovers will enjoy.

 

After first publishing this I have become made aware of the newest We-Vibe upgrade which will be hitting our shelves sometime in the next month or so: The We-Vibe 4 Plus. This is pretty much the same as the We-Vibe 4, but it can be controlled via a smart-phone app... From anywhere IN THE WORLD!!!

Needless to say... I WANT ONE!
Will Keep you all posted. Until then...
Happy Buzzing, my friends!

UPDATE!! OMG I am so so excited to announce I will be reviewing some amazing new products for the awesome crew at Sex Toys 247 (It's a link! Click it!!) First one will be a We-Vibe 4+
See! Dreams do come true!!

Review: Palm Power by Swan

As most people who read my reviews know, I am a buzz girl. A clitoris chick. An outie. While I don't mind vaginal and G-Spot stimulation (and am slowly learning to get the best out of it) when it comes to solo play and the best way to orgasm, I always default to the buzz.

I own a couple of wand toys and have always been impressed with the strength of the vibrations so I wasn't expecting anything that new or exciting with the new wand-like toy, The Palm Power Massager, from the makers of Swan. Boy, was I wrong.

This toy has buzz. Serious fucking buzz. Even the lowest setting is stronger than the fastest setting of some other toys I own which makes for some seriously good, toe-curling orgasms. It also plugs into the mains so there are no batteries to change or charging times to wait for before you use it. It is controlled by a single button which you push to turn on and then hold down to increase the power and then a single push turns it off. You can't move up and down through the speeds which can be a bit frustrating, but overall it is really simple to use and doesn't get confusing with all different buttons and pulses and settings like some other toys can.

One of the cool things that sets this toy apart from other wands are the interchangeable caps you can buy as extras. The toy comes with a small rounded head which can be popped off and replaced with four different shaped and sized caps for other functions. The two different packs (containing two heads each) are the PalmSensual and the PalmBody attachments.

PalmSensual contains the Palm Below cap which is a G-Spot stimulator attachment and the Palm Dual that works in the same way as a rabbit vibe, with an insertable piece and a clitoris stimulator on the side.

The PalmBody attachments are directed at other parts of your body that may need massaging. The Palm Finger has two prongs set close together for more localised muscle manipulation, and the Palm Arm has them further apart and is designed to run along your arm or leg for a muscle massage. These two caps really do work well for back, neck and arm massages, but can also be used as sex toys for both the female and the male. Seriously, you can stroke the penis between the two prongs of the arm massager and get a fantastic sensation (according to the husbandman).

All the caps are made of silicone and, although the wand itself is not waterproof, the caps are all very easy to take off and wash.

I would say this toy ticks all the clitoris boxes and can even, after a few orgasms, be a bit too powerful for even me to handle (lucky it takes a while to get to that stage). But I love it. It has a permanent spot on the power board next to my bed and has made my Hitachi almost redundant.

Happy buzzing, my friends!